"Do Not Diss the Updated Version of Me"

When we are born, we have very little that defines us but a few years into the process of life we have a personality that defines us and habits that are part of who we are. We pass from version to version as we learn better and become wiser about life and those, we call friends and family. As we are going through the different versions of ourselves, we add and we subtract. Some of what we add, later down the road through the years of our life we delete in the next version when we realize something does not work for us.

Our Parents Model Behaviors

Not to blame parents for any of our dysfunctions but using it as a tool to recognize what we need to update in the next version of ourselves. I do not like for someone to use a negative behavior against me that I deleted from my current version just because it justifies a point they are trying to make. I am sure many of my readers have worked hard, as I have to become a better version of ourselves as life moves along.

I know some things I learned from my parent’s behavior because I saw myself doing the exact thing in my relationships. Some of those things are good and beneficial to me now but some things, I did not want to be in my reactions now that I’m an adult. So, I corrected it, developed new responses, so that now as my new version emerges, no one has the right to accuse me of something that was in my old version. And if they do, they diss who I have become, the new version of me.

Updating Frequency

I wrote a book in the mid-to late-90’s of some of my experiences overseas as a missionary as well as poems I’d written, etc. Every time I reprinted it, it was a new version because I either added stories, deleted other pieces and made corrections. I have the original version as a keepsake but that is not what the book is today because what I’ve done with it has made it better.

I refer to my mental and emotional growth as taking “growth spurts” through the years. I will gain insights into certain behaviors, ways of thinking or speaking and how I need to do an undated version of me. I do not want to ever accept status-quo for me but rather look how I can best update to a new version so that I’m the best for me and for those around me.

Choose Carefully Those Around You

Sometimes people who are stuck in their stubborn ways, will now like how much work you put into bettering yourself into a more acceptable person. Those are the occasions when a co-worker, a family member or any other person close to you will diss the new version of you by accusing you of how “you always are”. You have to forgive them for their blindness and continue living in the updated version of you with pride.

If people are content living with an outdated version of themselves that is their choice but never let them diss the new version of you. Every time you experience a “growth spurt” in emotional responses, in more mature reactions to people and better communication tools, use them, be proud that you can graduate to the new updated version of you.